When I was studying Data Processing at Portland Community College, I became great friends with an instructor, Tom Thornhill. We were always making up stories about “Letha and the Great Dane” and often added other PCC employees to the story. Tom is the funniest man I know. He recited this humorous poem more than a few times.
* * *
I ‘ll tell you a little story, a story that I’ve heard.
You may think it’s fable, but it’s the gospel, every word.
When the Lord made father Adam, they say He laughed and sang,
As He sewed up Adam’s belly with a little piece of Whang.
But when the Lord was finished, he found He’d measured wrong,
For when the Wang was knotted, it was several inches long.
Said he, “Tis but eight inches, so I guess I’ll let it hang”.
So He left on Adam’s belly, that little piece of Whang.
But when the Lord made mother Eve, they say that he did snort.
For when the Whang was knotted, it was several inches short
“This leaves an awful crack”, said He, “but I don’t give a dang.
She can fight it out with Adam for that little piece of Whang”.
So ever since that fateful day when human life began,
There’s been a constant struggle twixt the woman and the man.
The women say they’ll have that piece that on our bellies hang,
To fill that awful crack where the Lord ran out of Whang.
So let us not be selfish, boys, with what the women lack,
But give the women what they need to fill that awful crack.
For the good Lord never intended that it should idly hang,
When He left on Adam’s belly, that little piece of Whang.
